The other afternoon, shortly before the sun was going down, I went outside on our lanai just to enjoy the view and see if any of my tomatoes or beans were ripe. The sun was just beginning its final descent over the mauka [toward the sea] hills, and I stood there enjoying the last of its warmth, very aware that soon it would be dark, and the view lost to me.
Because my mother’s death and all that surrounded it have continued to take up so much of my time and energy these past weeks, I’ve often said to my closest friends, “I missed summer!” Ordinarily I look forward to Autumn and its glorious colors even though it signifies that the rains will soon be here, and gray days will replace the bright ones of summer. But this year I have been wishing that I could be like the legendary Hawaiian demi-god Maui, who captured the sun and made it slow down for six months out of the year so that his mother could have more time for her kapa to dry. I have been craving the bright, sunny days of summer, knowing all too well that just as night was coming as I stood there out on my lanai, winter was coming and with it, the shorter, darker months that I wanted to somehow delay.
As I stood there, suddenly I saw a spider spinning her web, its delicate strands caught in the rays of the setting sun. I just stood there, in awe, and I realized that God was speaking to me as I watched the spider making her way from one end of the web to the other. He said, “Mokihana, you resent the coming darkness, but look at the treasure I have for you in the midst of it! You never would have seen this spider if the sun hadn’t been setting!”
I realized then that what I was seeing and hearing had much bigger implications. I also saw that so often I tend to see only the darkness in my life, forgetting that along with it, are moments bright and shining, if only I’ll take time to stop and look for them. Too often I miss the miraculous.
Mahalo, ke Akua, for speaking to me this way. For helping me learn to be transformed by the renewing of my mind, and for allowing me to see your humble creature dressed in royalty even as darkness begins to settle over the land.