Caution: Highly Pidgin

Wat? U neva know had more? Me needa. Pau da scary ride wit MrCrazyman Tow Truck driva. Pau getting excuses “It’ll scratch the paint on my tow truck if I come up your driveway! Pau all dat. At least till last week.

September 7th I wen post about dat day right hea. Afta dat, I needed new tires all da way around. So now need one alignment, right? Right.

But first, I gotta backtrack small kine.

When I had to have alla work done on my car last month, I took it to our regular car doc. When I wen pick it up, $800+ later, I heard dis noise dat wasn’t dea before. Like dis kinda “tick tick tick” sound. So I wen drive da car back to da doc and wen tellum, “Eh, try listen dis noise!” He wen go wit me on one tess drive, windows down, so he could hear it. But we heard nothing. Of course.

So, feeling kinda pupule [crazy], I started back home again. I heard da noise. Plain as day. Da only difference was dis time my windows stay up. So back I went. Dis time we wen just go around da block, and da doc wen hear da noise. Whew!

Doc wen open up da hood. Couldn’t see any kine. He thought mebbe was da air intake da kine, oa else something cuz now everything stay so clean insai. But he no could find anything. So I wen go home, hearing dat cunfunnit noise all da way. Dis wen go on foa about two weeks, and I was getting ticked off (heh heh heh) about it big time. I also felt more den just small kine pupule.

K’den. Back to getting da alignment. On to Les Schwab Tires. Got da alignment, and driving away, I couldn’t hear dat tick tick tick noise nomo! Hmm…. I know! Da menehune wen get insai wen I no stay looking and wen fixum!

Foa about four days all was well. Den I began hearing yet anodda noise. Not a tick. Not exactly a rattle, but kinda like. Nolemana and I were on our way to a group meeting, and even he could hear it. Sheesh. My life stay plagued wit dumb noises!

Was dark by da time we wen turn onto our small gravel road. Ho! I wen hear one ominous noise. Loud. I wen pray, “Just let us get up our long, steep driveway!” Da noise was bad. I wen park da car facing out jass in case. Nolemana wen get out da flashlight and wen lift up da hood. At first, he no could see any kine. But den, afta looking moa close, he wen find da pilikia [trouble]!

OMG. Da very first thought in my mind was, “See!! I was right!! Had one noise all dis time, and wasn’t cuz of one clean engine oa da air intake da kine!” And I admit, I wen feel totally vindicated! Ha! U like see wat was? K’den. Try look.

See dat litto bugga?

I knew wat wen happen! Da car techie kane [man] wen leave dat bugga insai my engine and it wen make da tick tick tick sound. But den, somehow during da alignment, da bugga wen slip down and da noise wen go away. But den, jass wit driving, it wen slip onto dat rod da kine and wen make dat horrible noise.

Da next morning, afta me and Nolemana wen take photos of da wrench insai my engine, I wen call up da car doc. “Eh!” I wen tellum. “U folks wen lose one wrench?” “Oh”, da receptionist wen tell me, “we lose ’em alla time! U wen find one?” Oh! Try wait. Da folks down dea no speak pidgin. Instant replay: “Oh yes, the guys lose them all the time; they’re always setting them down someplace. Why? Did you find one?”

I wen tell, “Yeah, I did.”

“Well”, she wen tell me, “just bring it by next time you’re in town.”

Me: “I really can’t do that,” I wen tell her, “because the wrench stay stuck in… sheesh. No can take da pidgin outa da wahine! Take Two. The wrench is stuck in my car’s engine and I can’t drive it; it made a terrible noise last night.”

“Oh, my goodness!” she wen tell me.

She wen put me on hold while she wen go talk to da doc. She wen come back and wen tell me, “We’re going to send a tow truck out to bring your car in.”

I wen tell her, “You know, should I just try and take it out myself and drive the car in?”

She wen tell me ‘no’, cuz dey no like take chance about my engine. I wen ask her which towing company dey going send, and she wen tell me “Integrity Towing”. Yay!! He’s been up our driveway more than once, and neva has any kine pilikia wit branches and stuffs. And da car doc going pay for da tow. All was well.

In about an hour, up da driveway came Don wit his tow truck. Da big one. He wen back alla way up our driveway, which is pretty impressive, considering dat it’s about a tenth of mile long, with a sharp curve on an 18% grade.

He wen take da wrench out; turns out it wasn’t just a simple monkey wrench, but a reeyo expensive techie kine.

He wen do all his tow truck driva stuffs.

Up wen go da wheels onto da flat bed.

When u see da whole length of da truck, you realize how difficult it is to back up our driveway!

Don looks like one local boy; was freezing cold outside, and he stay in shorts!

I loved watching da flatbed get flat instead of slanted. Julie was dea and we wen watch da whole thing.

He wen cinch down da front wheels.

I liked seeing how da wheels and axle were attached. Check out da “Live Aloha” decal! I tell u, Don was one huge example of aloha in action.

Den away dey went, my car getting towed foa da second time in a month!

Down da steep hill dey go.

A few hours later, car doc wen call me. Da car stay ready. No damage. When we wen get dea, Nancy wen tell me was their wrench foa shua. One spendy one, too, like $40.00 worth of wrench! Da techie who wen lose it had been searching all ova foa it (their wrenches get notches in ’em to tell whose is whose), and wen hang his head, so hilahila (shame) foa leaving it in my engine.

Nomo tick tick tick. Nomo anykine noise. I stay vindicated.

Life is good.